


Together Alone

by Peachpanther96



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-02 15:22:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17266637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peachpanther96/pseuds/Peachpanther96
Summary: During the events in home world, Amethyst tries to process how she feels.





	1. Massive Ball

I never attended any serious parties before. Not like this. It feels so weird. The rules. The role I have to play After Garnet's wedding and the diamond fiasco, I haven't been feeling myself. This ball doesn't make it better.

Things do suck around here. I have to wear these limb enhancers for a height requirements. How did Peridot do it? I look ridiculous, yet I try to have fun with it. I try to put a smile on my face for Steven. Poor kid. He seemed stressed, and the thing I want the least is for him to worry about me. He needs to be calm enough for White Diamond and to have a conversation with her. All he wants is peace and wants to stop the terror across space. For him, I'm just going with the flow and support him the best I can. All of us are trying to do that. The thing that sucks the most is how Pearl is treated. She is like an object. I bet it makes her feel in an uncomfortable, and I don't want her to feel terrible for it. I do care for her, but I haven't told her how much I care. I am just so terrified to tell her something

When Garnet had her wedding, I imagined myself with Pearl and our happily ever after. In my imagination, I see me getting married to Pearl. I see us hugging and kissing. I see us together forever. We have experienced trouble in the past, but everything is good between us. We have grown closer throughout the years, but I haven't had the courage to tell her how I feel. I throw hints as well, but I'm to terrified to make it even more obvious. I really like her, but I don't think she will ever feel the same way for me. In fact, I think she isn't over Rose or Pink. Since the wedding, my imagination of us made me feel like crap because it will never be true, and it has put me down because of the reality. Again, I have been putting a smile for Steven and for the rest of the crystal gems. I pushed those thoughts away.

As the ball began, groups of gems started to dance to the weird music. Each group of gems type had their own dancing style, as well as the group of quarz I was in. All gems’ faces seem depressing because they seem to be bored. I caught myself having the same expression. The dance is so so boring, and I couldn't keep up. In fact, I was nervous because this is the first time I attended a home world dance and I wanted to impress everyone, especially Pearl. Also, I was still getting use to the limb enhancers and the dance. Unfortunately, the odds were not in my favor. I fell to the ground and I couldn't get up.

Suddenly, I see Connie and Steven on the dance floor. Everyone stopped and stared. We were all in shock. The two started to dance as I was still on the floor. Then, there was a flash of light and Stevonnie appeared.

“Pink! What are you doing?!”, Yellow screamed.

“I'm was just dancing and oh”, Stevonnie tried to explain.

“Pink, unfuse now or I will make you!”, Blue warned.

Then Garnet appeared. She told Blue that she has to go through her first.

After Garnet fused, I heard “And me”. I turned to Pearl's direction. She ran towards me. Her eyes were locked to mine. My artificial heart started to beat faster. She was right in front of me. She picked me up from the floor and I yelled with excitement. She literally swept me off my feet. I had a feeling that she wanted to fuse with me.

“Yeah!”

I was excited that Pearl went straight to me and fused with me. She could have stood in front of Garnet and Stevonnie by herself, but she chose to fuse with me instead. We became Opal. We were alone together in our own way. When I am Opal with Pearl, I feel this peace that I don't experience often. When we experience the peace, we read our thoughts and we come to terms with ourselves and each other. My thoughts of my love to her flow smoothly in Opal. Pearl now knows how I feel. It's like she is accepting my thoughts and she is not freaking out. If she did panic, we would have been standing as two individuals. We didn't unfuse. Instead, we were stable and together. As I come to that realization, I felt Pearl's thoughts of my feelings. It feels like she has the same feelings for me. For the first time as a fusion, I felt peace and happiness. 

As we were walking and processing our feelings, we stood next to Stevonnie and put our hands on their shoulder. We wanted to fight for us, for Stevonnie, and for Garnet. This demonstration and stand up is a representation of love. It was not criminal to be with someone you love with. We wanted to show them that two gems can come together because they love each other. Just like Ruby and Sapphire love each other. Just like Steven and Connie. Just like us.

Then a green fusion appeared. 

“And me!”

The three of us were confused, but it made us happy that we were inspiring other gems.

Suddenly, the green fusion was poofed. It was quick. It was so quick that we didn't see Yellow's shot coming to us. Now Opal was poofed. All that is left is our gems. I'm terrified, and I don't know what is going to happen to me or Pearl. What is going to happen to our team?

I wished I did say something sooner. We could have been happy before this. Now, I don't know if our tomorrow is promised. Our faith is now in the hands of heartless dictators. 


	2. Reformation

It's purple everywhere. Figures. I have been here before, and I have been here so many time. Nothing new. However, there is nothing but pure emptiness. This emptiness has a stressful vibe, something that I have experienced before. However, it was worse than that feeling. Last time I felt this, I was fighting Jasper and I got poofed. I felt rushed to reform because Connie and Steven needed my help. It turned out that they handled it, but I don't know about the situation we are in. Everyone was in danger, and I don't think I would do any help if I reform. I don't think that the others reformed yet. And I don't know if Steven and Connie are locked in jail. I can't do it alone. What would be of me if I was the only one reformed?

As I was wondering around my gem, my thoughts of Pearl motivated me. I had to do it for us, especially for her. I wasn't going to give up this fight. She never let me down. There were many times that she had my back recently, especially in the events of when I had doubts about myself and my body. I remember it as if it happened yesterday.  
.......  
One night, I heard footsteps coming towards me. I was laying on the bed that I had in my room and I was crying. I just couldn't take it anymore. Hours before this episode, I had a friendly fight with Steven, but it didn't prove to me of my worth. Tears have been streaming through my face as rapid waterfall, and I tried to force myself to stop the tears from flowing. I couldn't. Instead, I decided to put my face on my pillows hoping no one saw my face. I didn't want anyone to see me like this. I didn't want to talk about my issues with anyone. I wanted to avoid all this. Then I heard her voice.

“Amethyst, I made too much spaghetti for Steven. I was hoping for you to come out and for you to eat it all, but I decided to bring it to you instead. You haven't been out all day. Not ever since you and Steven ruined the ruins. Amethyst, is there something wrong? I promise to you that I'm not upset about it.”, Pearl said as she sat on my bed.

I didn't want to respond. I still had my face on my pillow.

“Amethyst, whatever you are going through, I'm hear to listen. If you don't want to talk about it, I'm here for you. You don't have to face anything alone,” she said as she put the plate on the drawer. 

That comment made me cry even more. I stood up with watery face and I looked down.

“ I'm not good enough. I'm worthless,” I told her with my crying raspy voice.

Suddenly, I felt her arms around me.

“ You're perfect in my eyes. You're beautiful, funny, fun, and strong. I admire your qualities. You are so much more. You're good enough, don't think that you are not. You're definitely worth it in my eyes," she told me.

She held me so tight. I stopped crying. Her embrace and her comments made me feel better. She didn't leave me. Instead, she stayed with me the entire night. She sang a lullaby, and I feel asleep in her arms. I woke up the next morning with her on my bed. She slept right next to me. She made me feel wanted.  
.......

It was my turn to be there for her. I had to put a thought of my physical body, and I had to do it fast. I decided to reform into the physical body that was perfect for me. The way Pearl saw me. How Garnet thought of me. Something that was perfect for me. As I was thinking of my reformation, I started to glow. I came back.

Then, I observed my surroundings. Where was I? What is happening? I was locked in. I was so confused of this outcome. There were loud sounds coming from all directions. As I was looking around, I was worrying now is about everyone's whereabouts. Is Steven and Connie safe from the diamonds? Where's Garnet? And...Then I looked down. Pearl's gem was on the ground. I grabbed it, and I held her close to me. I'm not letting her go. What are we going to do now? At least I am here with her. At least, I'm here to protect her.

"I got you, P. Take your time. I will be here waiting for you. Until then, I got you. You're not alone. You don't have to face it alone," I whispered to her as my tears passed through my cheeks and as I hugged her tight.


	3. Light

Hope is the only thing that helps me get through tough things. I think it helps everyone. It is represented as light. As long as there is light, there always an end of a tunnel. That's what humans say. Steven told me when he was trying to explain an episode of Crying Breakfast Friends. I didn't understand what the meant because I took things too literal. Plus, that cartoon didn't make sense at all. Now, I understand what Steven said. The only light I have is in my heart. There's nothing but darkness around, as if I'm never going to see daylight again. Is this how prisoners feel when they are locked up? At least I have Pearl with me.

The darkness comes with unsettling sounds, like the ones that people hear in a war action movie. There were loud bangs as if Homeworld was being destroyed. The sounds were loud that it terrified me. I don't know what is happening around here, but it doesn't sound good. It sounds like the homeworld is in war. I just hope that they didn't hurt poor Steven. All he wanted was to bring everyone together, but the darkness in the diamonds’ soul made it hard to bring that peace.

Light is good though, the peace. When everyone understands each other, there isn't a dark result of it. Instead, there is a bright one. We compromise and we agree of what we can do to make things better. It all starts with communication. It's funny how these situations always relate to me and Pearl because that's how it was when we made up after the fights.

As I said before, we are in good terms now. I just regret we did fight. I was mad because of her love for Rose. I should have been more supportive instead of being angry. I was angry on how she was hurt by Rose. She didn't know why or relationship was bad, but my feelings and Rose's departure were factors. We were distant afterwards and we disagreed a lot. We made up because of Steven. He unconsciously helped us grow together again. We started to communicate with our feelings. Even though I wasn't very open about my feelings, I'm thankful that we understand each other. I wish we could have had our light in our relationship sooner.

As I struggled with my feelings, I decided to look outside our cell. I looked through the blue laser beams that held us in our cell. Unfortunately, it's just pure darkness. I do see two gem stones across our cell. I can't tell if it is Ruby and Sapphire or if it is the two mysterious gems that fused after Opal. I couldn't do anything else. If I did call out for the others, I could bring attention and I could be punished. I decided to stay quiet and wait. I will wait for the light that I desire to see. I sat next to Pearl, and I decided to hold on to her once more.

Then, hours went by. Too many hours. I was running out of patience. We were not getting out of here. I was freaking out. My hands were on my head. My breathe was running out, as if I really had it before. Now I'm gasping for air as if I were human. I started to pace back and forth in our cell. Tears start to fall out of my eyes. I decided to sit back down and held Pearl once more.

This time, holding Pearl felt different. My tearful eyes were shut when I held her, but I felt this unexpecting warmth. When I opened my watery eyes, I saw her glowing figure against me. My mouth was wide open because I couldn't believe it. When she reformed, she had her arms were around me. My arms were around her. She was hugging me back.

“P, you're back. Thank the stars. I'm so happy,” I told her. I was filled with joy that I started to cry with tears of happiness, not the tears I cried before.

Then our hug broke out. We were face to face. Her eyes sparked so beautifully. This is the light I haven't seen in a while. She's the light I needed. We locked eyes for a while. I was in awe with her reappearance and so was she. She was so beautiful. The space between us then became smaller as our faces became closer. All of a sudden, her lips were on my lips.

The kiss was so sweet, and surprisingly it tasted like strawberries. Our kiss was long and passionate. Then it became heated. She pushed me against the wall, and her hands were around me. I put my hands around her. This felt really good. We continued to make out until our lights began to glow. We formed Opal once more.

We looked down. We were at peace again. Opal held herself with her two arms. Then we remembered something. It was a surprise because we are forgetful. We both remembered that we couldn't be her right now. We unfused immediately after we came to terms with that. After, we hugged and we laughed. We were so lucky to have each other. Then I looked at her.

“Are you ok? Did they do anything else to you?”, she asked.

“No, I'm good. Are you okay?”, I asked her.

“Yes, I feel better. I would have been feeling worse if I were by myself. I'm lucky to have you,” she told me with a smile on her face.

“I'm lucky too,” I replied back to her.

Things may seem bad for us, but there is hope. We hugged once more. The light of our love is what is going to get us through this. I don't know how long we are going to be here, but we're here together, in each other's arms.


	4. Conversation

The intimate hug made things better for us. Like many say, actions speak louder than words. We both had feelings for each other, and we were demonstrating that. However, sometimes it is best to know things when they are explained. I'm curious to know how her feelings for me developed. I still can't believe that she picked me out of anyone. I'm not perfect like her, and I'm way out of her league.

As my thoughts were running through my head and I held Pearl so close, she broke our long lasting hug. She was facing me.

“Do you know how long we've been in here? What's going on out there?”, she asked me as her eyes locked to mine and as she became more aware of our surroundings

I shrugged. I don't have any of those answers. I wish I did.

“I'm terrified, Amethyst. I don't know what they will do to us, but it's going to be bad. I know several things they can do, and I'm scared,” she explained to me in a scared expression.

It made me feel more terrified when she said those words. However, I had to show her that I'm strong and she had me by her side.

“Don't worry, P. Like Steven has said before, even if we can't, the crystal gems will always find a way. We have to be calm and we have to think of a plan to get out of here.”

“ We can't get out of here. There's no way out, and we don't know where's Garnet.”

“It's pretty dark outside, and there's a jail cell across from us. I can't tell if the gems are Ruby and Sapphire’” I added.

“ I think we have to just sit and wait for the outcome. I just hope Steven and Connie are ok,” Pearl said as her body began to shake.

“ Yeah. I think we have to think of happy thoughts. I predict that Steven and Connie escaped and they are kicking ass. That's what I think. It's pretty much what power couples tend to do in action movies. Heck, we even see celebrity power couples working great together. Lovers succeed together,” I said.

“ You think the two are in love? They are too young, but I understand what you are trying to say. The people that love each other tend to work together and fight together. It reminds me of the times we have fought together, “ she told me.

Then, it hit me. We have fought together side by side since I have been a crystal gem. However, our team work has improved lately, but I don't know when that started for us. The earliest memory was when we were poofing the gem shards that we accidentally release, but I can't remember any other events that shows our improvement. This is when I decided to ask her a tough question.

“ When did you start to have feelings for me? I have noticed that our work has been better, but I'm trying to figure out when you feel for me. I'm sorry, I just still trying to process this. I'm shocked that you like me. Out of anyone, you picked me.”

Pearl looked down after the question. She seemed to have a thinking yet happy face. Her cheeks began to form teal colored blush.

“ I started to get feelings for you when Steven tried to force us to fuse to Opal. After our fusion, I began to find that we have more things in common than I thought. I began to understand you. I was interested in knowing you better, more than a teammate. Even though we are both different, I started to find you fascinating. And everything after our fusion, you were there for me. Everything you did, I was in awe. I was feeling better about myself. I fell for you, but I was scared to share my feelings because I didn't want to ruin what we had. “

As I was about to respond to her, I hear a chuckle.

“My future vision was right, but I wanted to see it to believe it,” Garnet said.

“Garnet!”, we both screamed with excitement.

I was so happy that Garnet was across from us. Then we started to ask questions about our dangerous situation.

“Garnet, do you know how to get out of here?”, Pearl asked.

“ Dude. There's a lot of commotion going on outside. How are we going to get out of here?”, I asked.

Then there was a silent pause. After a few seconds, Garnet began to respond. I thought she would give us her ideas or any solutions, but instead she said something else.

“I'm sorry to interrupt. You both were having an intimate moment. You guys have to finish your conversation first,” she said.

“ G, how could we when you're there and when we are in danger. We have no idea what is going to happen to us?!”

“ Be optimistic about everything. You two have to finish what you guys were talking about. This conversation is going to help.”

I had no idea why Garnet said that. However, we did decide to talk.

“Okay then. But Garnet, can you like turn around and cover your ears?”, I asked.

Garnet said yes, and she did respect our privacy. I started to continue my conversation with Pearl.

“Pearl, I know how you feel. I had feelings before you did have feelings for me. Before Rose left us. I didn't want to tell you because you would break my heart. You did have feelings for Rose still. I was angry for so long. You loved her but you would never fall for me. My feelings did kind of ruined our friendship. But now, I'm so surprised. I can't believe we like each other.”

“ You had feelings for me for that long? Wow. I'm surprised. What made you have these feelings for so long, “ she asked.

“ Because you are perfect. You have been my number one supporter for so long. Plus you're hot,” I explained with a smile on my face.

Not longer after that, we still talked. It felt like for hours. I felt bad for Garnet because she was near a corner like a punished child. We revealed many of our feelings that weren't so obvious. I then started to understand what Garnet said. This conversation did help. It helped me understand and see Pearl's perspective. It helped her as well. After we ended our conversation. We hugged and kissed.

All of the sudden, we heard a long bang. The bang was so close to us, and light started to shine the prison's hallway. We both turned around and held each other tight. We heard footsteps coming near us. We closed our eyes shut because we were terrified. Then I hear the footsteps stop. It feels like someone is in front of our cell. Oh no. I don't want to see.


	5. Escapism

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own the lyrics to Escapism. It is by Rebecca Sugar. However, it such a cute song.

Everything seemed to be taking a wrong turn, it seems to me. My shaking arms were around Pearl, as my breathing became faster. I was hyperventilating from the anxiety. I was having a panic attack, and this one seem like the worst one yet in my gem life. I still didn't dare to open my eyes as I felt I knew our tragic faith. We might get shattered or broken like White Pearl. Who knows what had happened to her, but I didn't want any of us hurt.

I wanted us to be okay, but it could not be okay in this world. I didn't want to accept that fact, but everything seemed like our lives were over. As I kept my eyes shut, I kept thinking about what could have been. What could have been if Homeworld never made contact to the Earth after the war? What could have been if we were on Earth right now? It sucks being here. Then a melody was stuck in my head. My head started humming beautiful harmony, and I just sang in my mind how I felt.

 

I guess I'll have to face  
That in this awful place  
I shouldn't show a trace of doubt  
But pulled against the grain  
I feel a little pain  
That I would rather do without

I started to imagine things that were the opposite of what I was describing. I didn't want to feel the little pain anyone. Instead, thoughts were running about my life on Earth after this with Pearl. The first thing I rather do is to be with her all the time. I don't care if I have to be standing and staring at her clean. Or even help her clean. I even imagine us staring at the beautiful sunset and the mesmerising sky together. I rather be with her without the pain of losing her in this place. 

I'd rather be  
Free-ee-ee, free-ee-ee, free  
I'd rather be  
Free-ee-ee, free-ee-ee, free  
Free-ee-ee, free-ee-ee, free  
From here

This escape from my head calmed me down for a second. That's what I needed because now I'm focusing on the place where I want to escape to. Home. I grew a little brave for my sake and for Pearl. With my eyes still closed, I held Pearl tighter. This hug wasn't full with fear, but instead it was reassure about my bravery. I needed to be brave so we can escape back to our home. I was prepared for a fight. 

Then, things turned out to be unexpected as I heard Pearl's voice and I felt her move away from our hug.

“Amethyst, open your eyes.”

I slowly open my eyes and my eyes wandered around a the new atmosphere of our environment. There was light illuminating our cell as if it transformed the prison cell into a palace room. And there they were. Steven and Connie we're standing right in front of us. They were taking Garnet out of her cell because of their organic form. The beams didn't hurt the appearance. Then, they turned around.

“Pearl! Amethyst!,” they both screamed with glee.

Without hesitation, they helped us get out our cell. As we got out, we were standing on the hallway, waiting for a hug from everyone. We all hugged each other at the same time before the hug had to break off. We were all then laughing.

“ I’m so glad that I found you guys. I was so worried,” Steven explained.

“ Don't worry. We are all together. We were scared, but we had each other,” Pearl added.

“ Yeah, it was a good thing you two were in a cell together, as well as Garnet,” Connie said.

“ Yeah, it seemed like you were supporting each other, as if you two were lovers like Garnet,” Steven said with a chuckle.

“ Hey!”, I screamed with a purple blush on my two cheeks. I noticed that Pearl blushed as well. Now, Steven and Connie knew.

Then Garnet stopped the conversation.

“I'm glad that were are all together, but we need to get out of here and escape homeworld back to Earth. We need to focus and we need a plan,” Garnet said.

“ Um Garnet. I don't think think we have time for that right now. We need to get out of here quick. The diamonds are looking for me. We need to hide,” said Steven.

We all freaked out. We knew that we weren't in a good position, but it seemed that we are in a deeper hole than we thought we were. Without hesitation Pearl took out her weapon.

“ Let's go then!”

We all started to run to the hole that was on the wall. Stars only know how the two kids made that hole. Maybe the flew through the wall with the bubble. I don't know, but it made it easier for us to escape. Now we were one step ahead to my escapism with Pearl. All I have to do is to keep my head up for the sake of the team. Our next thing is to find shelter. 

As we got out and ran, Steven suggested to hide at the place where he met the off color gems. We were still on the surface of homeworld, but we were not spot. We stopped, and we jumped to the bottom of homeworld, as Pearl and I held our hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it took so long to post this chapter. I had an exam to focus on, but I'm here now. Hopefully, you all enjoy this story so far. By the way, did y'all like the recent episode? It was so cute. Also, I'm super hyped for the one hour event. Anyway, I'll try to post every week. Peace!!!


End file.
